Yeah. Really. This story is all over the place today.

Apparently, a woman from Poland is taking an Egyptian hotel to court. The reason? The woman claims her 13 year old daughter got pregnant by using the hotel's swimming pool.

A travel industry source said "The mother is adamant that her daughter didn't meet any boys while she was there and is determined to go ahead with the case."

Seriously. Stray sperm in a swimming pool? WTF?!

Hmm... I've heard a lot of rants about this and how Perez Hilton got what he deserved, etc, etc. But I personally believe that hitting someone in the face is never the right thing to do, especially when the person you're hitting is way overly dramatic and you know he'll be annoying as all hell about it, as was Perez in this situation.

So, Perez Tweeted that he needed the cops and he Tweeted that Will.i.am from the Black Eyed Peas assaulted him:

"I was assaulted by Will.I.Am of the Black Eyed Peas and his security guards. I am bleeding. Please, I need to file a police report. No joke."

Well, Will.I.Am. did NOT assault Perez. His manager hit him in the face. And so, after Perez's interesting encounter with the artist, where he called him "gay" and a "faggot" (also a bit odd, considering Perez is a huge advocate for equality and for not using derogatory words such as those), and then wrongly accused Will.I.Am of assaulting him... is there an apology floating around?! Of course not. I understand Perez's anger about being hit in the face, but wrongfully accusing Will.I.Am of assault when it wasn't him? ALSO COMPLETELY AND TOTALLY WRONG! So, there's no apology as of yet from Perez, and I don't expect to see one any time soon. He will most likely continue being overly dramatic and obnoxious about the entire situation.

It sucks he got hit in the face, but after reading/hearing everything about all of this, everybody needs to apologize and shut up about it. It's over. Enough said. 

So, here be the video of Perez calling Will.I.Am a "fucking faggot" - SO FUCKED UP DUDE! Thanks to TMZ, everyone gets to actually hear Perez Hilton use that kind of messed up language in pure anger. It's sad really.

Ha, ha, ha. Sorry, title makes me laugh.

Anyway, Mattel and Nickelodeon people are creating an older version of Dora the Explorer aimed at young girls ages 5 through 10. The image above is the silhouette of the "new" Dora that Mattel released a bit ago. And apparently, the image pissed off a bunch of moms.

Ha, ha, another great headline. The Huffington Post had the headline "Did Mattel turn Dora the Explorer into a Tramp?" for their article on the topic. 

Mattel and Nickelodeon say this new Dora is not replacing Dora the Explorer, it's just going to be a new interactive doll for a slightly older age group than the current little bity Dora is aimed at. Fun!

Leigh Anne Brodsky, president of Nickelodeon Viacom Consumer Products says "People care so deeply about this brand and this character. The Dora that we all know and love is not going away."

Gina Sirard, VP of marketing at Mattel says "I think there was just a misconception in terms of where we are going with this. Pretty much the moms who are petitioning aging Dora up certainly don't understand... I think they're going to be pleastly happy once this is available in October, and once they understand this certainly isn't what they are conjuring up."

Yeah. TAKE THAT overprotective, let's ruin EVERYTHING idiot moms out there!

This slightly older version of Dora is NOT wearing makeup, she's got on a tunic and leggings. The BRATZ dolls were little sluts. Dora the slightly older explorer is not. 

Damn. I get so annoyed at parents who freak out about a bunch of crap when they shouldn't. It's these same parents who are buying their 11 year olds little mini skirts and tube tops thinking it's cute, but something like this new Dora is unbelievable to them and must be stopped! WTF?! Ew. Annoying. 

Seriously... what. the. fuck. Why are there hoards of women screaming and yelling and pushing to audition for America's Next Top Model in Manhattan when all the contestants of the show ever really get is Tyra talking about Tyra. Oh, and Tyra telling them how they could change to be more like Tyra. Or Tyra telling the contestants what Tyra would do in the same situation. Or Tyra getting out of her judges chair to show them how Tyra would do it. You get my point. This video is insanity.

And could cause seriously unwanted messes!

Michael O'Leary, Ryanair boss, the guy who first suggested and started charging airline customers to check bags, has come up with another way to make a buck 30,000 feet up: charge people to use airline toilets. WTF?!

O'Leary is considering putting a coin slot on the toilet door in Ryanair airplanes.

O'Leary said "One thing we have looked at in the past, and are looking at again, is the possibility of maybe putting a coin slop on the toilet door, so that people might have to actually spend a pount to 'spend a penny' in future."

Nice. Realy nice.

When asked in an interview what would happen if someone didn't have correct change, O'Leary responded with "I don't there's anybody in history gone on board a Ryanair aircraft with less than a pound." This statement, however, could be false, as many customers of Ryanair may actually NOT have a pound, since Ireland and much of Europe uses eruos as opposed to British currency. 

Anyway, I think this is ridiculous. And I would be pissed (literally) if someone tried to make me pay to pee on a flight.

So, I was sent this article and it's pretty gnarly.

The Center for Diseas Control says that playing beer pong unprotected is almost as dangerous as having unprotected sex. WTF?!

Sharing those red cups with everyone else in the room for a few games of beer pong is like swapping spit with everyone there and everyone they're swapping spit with on the side. Mono, the flu and herpes can all be caught just by playing beer pong. 

The CDC has said one way to cut the probability of catching a disease from beer pong is to use water in all the cups (it's cleaner), though this isn't very popular (obviously - it's called BEER pong, not WATER pong). The CDC has also said that reports of the virus are up 230 percent from 2007 in people ages 17 to 21, and it's all from sharing cups. Lovely.

Rather nasty. I've played. But never again. At least not now. That's totally digusting!

RapeLay is a game involving the rape of women, forced abortion, murder, etc. Amazon banned the sale of the game. Good!

Check out this about the sickness of the game. Really, this is gnarly.

Ummm... WTF?! Is THIS for real? I have read Pride and Prejudice, but it never occurred to me to throw some zombies in the tale. 

And so, my obsession continues. That peanut plant in Georgia that I've been ranting about... the idiots actually shipping contaminated peanut butter 12 times in the past two years... and they KNEW IT WAS CONTAMINATED! YOU BASTARDS! Ugh.

The recent salmonella outbreak has now killed 8 people and made at least 500 more sick across the country.

The FDA and CDC (the ones investigating this sticky mess) said the Peanut Corporation of America found salmonella in internal tests 12 times in 07 and 08 - yet they still sold the products.  Here's the LIST of all the products their idiocy has caused to be recalled.

So, I'm officially annoyed. I hope a bunch of people are getting fired for this mess. 

Personally, I think this is just straight WRONG! Bart Simpson does NOT endorse Scientology, though Nancy Cartwright (Bart's voice) does, she's wrecking my world by using him to promote crap. Bart belongs to Reverend Lovejoy's church, not Scientology. Ew. Sorry, not a fan of Scientology. I think it's a bunch of bullshit.

So, taking a character that I have grown up with and loved for years and turning him into a freaking Scientology event robocall is annoying and stupid. Ew.